Jin Xiu's Journey

This week marks our two-year anniversary as a forever family. Can it be possible that it has already been 24 months since our phenomenal adventure began when I first met my gorgeous daughter, and she first met me? Surely I have counted the days incorrectly. Is it possible that it is two years already. I can recall the moment Emilee was placed in my arms as if it were yesterday, but then I can not remember a time without her. There are times when Emilee is snuggled so tightly in my arms that I think I am dreaming. How could this perfectly wonderful child be mine. Its amazing how the giant wings of our hearts are spread so lovingly across continents – one tip touching China, the other touching America – and in between only the warmth of extreme love exists for real. WHOOSH! Emilee whizzes by with the erratic energy of a tumbleweed in search of an open plain. I am suddenly whisked into the present and I can’t help but beam delightedly at my daughter. I am so proud of my daughter. She amazes me everyday . I am in awe at the way she looks at life and more amazed at the ways she skips and sings through it. “How silly!” I can almost hear her little voice telling me, “I’m just doing my life”. But from where I am perched, adoring her, I see an extremely courageous, incredibly bright, and abundantly loving little girl who will always see a glass as half-full and never miss an opportunity in this bountiful, amazing, enticing world that lies in front of her, awaiting her adventurous little spirit. I glance at the photos from our China Travels and I notice just how amazingly she has grown – emotionally as well as physically. She was once a tiny bundle who could barely lift her head, let alone sit up. Now she is a very tall, strong, adventurous child that runs, skips and climbs through life with the greatest of ease. I am amazed by her outlook on life. She is not afraid to try or experience anything. Which was quite evident when she went skiing this winter at the tender age of two and by her second run down the mountain declared that she wanted to try it on her own. Not wanting to stifle my daughter’s free spirit I held my breath as my dare-devil took to the slopes like a natural. Leaning her body back and forth to control where she wanted to go. That day was such a medifore for how she handles life. She doesn’t see obstacles in her way; instead she sways and adjusts her self to the road ahead of her until she sees a clear path to follow. It is mystifying how strongly the “nurture” aspect of adoption influenced Emilee’s character. She already carries so many of my traits and characteristics into her world and I am awestruck at how robust she has become – definitely a sporty, creative, bright, and ambitious little girl – with a lot of girlie-ness peeking out from underneath her cheeky grins. Every day, I witness how her “sparkly and glittery” personality scatters her path with inspiration and showers the world with a joy purely of her own making. I feel how her spirit has burst with the boldness that once lay dormant beneath her surface – her body waiting to burst into the action it was meant to produce. I see how certain she is of the world she now navigates. I hear how her voice is no longer silenced - how the volume of her living has magnified with confidence. Emilee’s presence is so charitable, one always knows when she is near. The bond that brings the biggest smile to my heart is the one formed between my Mother and My daughter. Its amazing watching the two of them interact. Emilee adores her grandmother with the intensity of the sun. She is always hugging and kissing her and forgets that I am around when ever she walks in the room. All day long she is always asking me to call grandma so she can speak to her, or if she makes something she patiently waits until she see her to give her grandma her latest creation. It’s the sweetest thing ever. My Mother is also captivated by this little bundle that took over her life. Just one look at my mothers face when Emilee walks in the room is all you need to realize the love and devotion she shines on her. All I can say is, it has been a brilliant, splendid and magnificent two year since we became a family! So, as we prepare to celebrate our two-year Family Day Anniversary this week, I marvel at what the past 24 months have brought to us. We have all grown in unfathomable ways – we are sometimes unable to articulate just how we have each navigated our immensely changed and precious worlds. We have woven such a loving web of life together. None of us quite remember, with much clarity, our lives before Xiu Xiu. This year I was blessed with a little gift of my daughters past. It came two-fold. The first came from a fellow Xuwen mom who went to visit Xuwen and was fortunate enough to speak with the staff and relay their character, wishes and hopes for our children. It assured me that my daughters first home was a loving warm environment filled with people of good character who truly cared and nurtured her. The second came via email from her SWI. It was only four short sentences expressing how much she was missed and cared for and who had found and named her. But to me it was as if a great archeological treasure was unearthed. All though I have particular hopes that Emilee’s early memories remain intact in her heart, I also hope that they are somehow softened by the depth of love and security that we have amassed for her. So, what is the “wonder” that has filled the past two years? I could say that it has been the “making of a mother and daughter”, or more likely, the “making of a family”. I could also say that the past two years have been about the “joys and the blessings of being in my little girl’s life” each and every day. More significantly, I shine the light on my daughter. Two years ago this month she was a 9 month old newly adopted child who had her world turned upside down in one day. She couldn’t sit up without support. She couldn’t roll over without a gentle nudge. She hadn’t known the glorious taste of solid foods. And she certainly hadn’t known the feeling of being held and cuddled by a family that loves her unconditionally.She couldn’t have expected how completely (and how easily) this woman – a strangers at first - would devote her live to her – rapidly overcoming their own vulnerability and humility through experiences such as singing silly songs (and quite loudly) with her in crowded restaurants, while walking through parks, while shopping. And she certainly couldn’t have expected that she would find herself, and quite deservedly, amidst a daily abundance of more nourishment, more toys, more books, more play, more freedom --- more life --- than her bright little mind could ever have imagined. Emilee’s response to all of this? A heart warming daybreak smile each and every morning! Topped by those cheeky grins that keep me on my toes! I knew I would love being a Mother. But I was unprepared for how much this amazing child would take over my life, turn it upside down and make me happier than I have ever been. I can not thank her enough for that.