A birthday letter to you, my darling, Xiu Xiu:
Dear Xiu Xiu,
When I look at you, I see all the best that the world has to offer. You are everything I have ever hoped, dreamed, & prayed for. You are strong & good, you are smart & brave. You are my daughter forever! I will always love you; I will always take care of you! I will always do my very best for you! It is so incredible how God and destiny knew you were to be my daughter since the beginning of time. Since I was a child I always knew there was a child out there that was ment to be mine. I prayed for you everyday. I longed for you. Waited and waited for you with every curve ball thrown my way. I knew I loved you before I even met you. You were there in my dreams every night. I never gave up I knew you were out there. You just were not ready to come home. But when the time was right and I held you for the first time, the universe aligned and stood still for just a second. And my life was complete and we became a family.
Xiu Xiu, always remember that there are some very special people who loved you & took care of you until you could come to your forever home. Again, God had a plan, His plan was so perfect, and He put people into your life to care for you while you waited so patiently for me to go to China & bring you home. I will always be greatful to these woman. The one who carried you into this world and the ones who took care of you for your first nine months.
I pray & thank God every day for the wonderful woman who gave birth to you. She loved you enough to carry you inside of her for nine months. I am forever grateful to her! I am sure that as she gazed upon you for the first time, she fell completely in love with you just as I have. She wanted what was best for you. A better life than what she could give you. She knew deep inside that it was not gods plan for her to raise you. That although she would carry you in her heart forever, destiny told her that you were another womans daughter! I thank her for her courage & her love for you. Without her, I never would have had you!!!!I pray & thank God every day for your Nannies at the Xuwen SWI. They loved & took care of you for nine months! (And, I am sure they still love you & think of you daily….how could they not???)
These special people not only loved you, they hugged & kissed you, they fed you, they played with you, they laughed with you, they cared for you when you were sick…They are truly angels from God! Because of them, you were able to completely love, accept, & trust ! I am forever grateful to them!
Xiu Xiu, I know someday you will have many questions, but I hope you never question my love for you ….Xiu Xiu, you do not have my eyes ( but yours are so beautiful) & you do not have my hair ( but yours is so gorgeous) however, you do have my heart!…and know, that we are so connected….my every fiber of who I am breathes you in….you are so a part of me….my heart & soul are filled with you…you simply, but grandly, are my daughter….I had dreamt of you for years…now I will hold you in my arms forever!!!!
I love you forever & always,Mom
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